Whoa Nellie. The hiatus during which the Locks' life fell apart and then was painstakingly put back together...the hiatus that involved such unsavory events as concussions, falling off stools in strip clubs, the placement of asinine, unwinnable wagers, being asked to leave football stadiums, restaurants and public benches alike, and the abandonment of the gambling life...that hiatus has mercifully ended. We're back in time for the stretch run of the NFL season and the kickoff of college football bowl season.
We'll kick off the great revival by pulling back the curtain on week 15 of the NFL to reveal a plethora of can't lose winners:
Denver @ Indianapolis - Line is Colts -6.5 - The Locks hates the Broncos - and that was before they kicked the shit out of our NY Football Giants on Thanksgiving in a game that we flew to Denver to see in person. That said, they are playing well again and with a serious purpose. Plus, they need this game much, much, much more than the team from Indy. We're not picking the Broncos to win but we think this is a very close game, keeping with Indy's propensity of not covering lines (dating back several years). Champ Bailey will lock down Reggie Wayne and the Denver defense also shuts down Tight Ends so don't expect Dallas Clark to do much. This will force Manning to beat them with the likes of Pierre Garcon and Joey Addai. It will happen....but not by more than 6 points. Denver will try to run the ball and run the clock, ultimately losing a close game in the final two minutes. Take Denver +6.5. LOCK IT UP
Cincinnati @ Minnesota - Line is Vikings -6.5 - Here's another game that we like the favorite to win but not cover. We see this as a bit of smash-mouth type game in which the Vikings focus on getting All-Day AP back on track. The Bengals CBs are so good that they will make this more of a necessity for the Vikes as opposed to an option. Then there is the plodding offense of Cincy that last week entailed giving the ball to Ced Benson 36 times. The Bungels can't stretch the field and even though the Vikings are missing so key defenders, points will not be easy to come by. Cincinnati will keep this game closer than most expect and then fall to Minny. Take the points - Bengals +6.5. LOCK IT UP
NY Jets @ Tampa Bay - Line is Jets -3.5 - The Bucs are downright awful. Sure Josh Freeman can lead them down the field but then he feels inclined to throw pick after pick in the red zone. Caddy Williams is dinged up so even the mediocre run game looks to be on the skids. It is remarkable that the pathetic Jets would be a road favorite, but that is just how lame these half-wits from TB are. Am I backing Kellen Clemmons on the road as a favorite? You bet your 1997 Glenn Foley NY Jets jersey that I am. Thomas Jones will run wild. Take the Jets -3.5. LOCK IT UP
Buffalo @ Kansas City - Line is Bills -1.5 - Now here is another really bad team that is giving points on the road. Really? The Bills are "expected" to secure a W away from upstate NY? What is there that I don't know? Here is what I do know. They have the worst run defense in the NFL. There #1 QB to start the season is so bad that he has been benched in favor of Ryan Fitzpatrick. Yes, that Ryan Fitzpatrick. Their offensive line is so inept that they make Marshawn Lynch look like Julius Jones. Now the Chiefs are not the Saints, heck, they are not even the Chiefs of two seasons ago. However, they have some spunk. They are playing some youngsters looking to prove their worth. The team seems to be buying into Todd Haley's plan. Most importantly, they are at home and playing the Bills. We just can't lay points with Buffalo on the road. Take KC and the points (+1.5). LOCK IT UP
Green Bay @ Chicago - Line is Packers -4 - This line just doesn't make any sense to us - which probably means it is right on the number. These teams are at opposite ends of the spectrum and quickly moving even further away from each other. Sure this is a tough divisional rivalry but is there anyone who things the Bears are going to magically figure something out this weekend? The Packers D gets better each week as they get more comfortable with Dom Capers newly implemented approach. Combined that with an Aaron Rodgers who looks like one of the 3 best QBs in the league and this game doesn't feel close. The Bears cannot run the ball and they give up oodles of points. All that points to Jay Cutler needing to throw the ball a lot. And that points to several interceptions for the Packers D. We love Green Bay here. Take them and give Da Bears the points. Packers -4. LOCK IT UP
Detroit @ Baltimore - Line is Ravens -14 - Wow. This one is tough. We hate to lay this many points in any game, especially when the favorite isn't the Saints. However, a Daunte Culpepper-led Lions team has the potential to score negative points. I'm not buying the Ravens D as being back to its imposing self, but it doesn't have to be. The Locks loves Ray Rice. He will go off in this game. However, Flacco may keep this closer than we think. He's lost right now. If I could only imagine the Lions scoring some points, I'd take the dog. However, this has the potential to be a shutout. All things considered, we have to reluctantly lay the points. Take the Ravens -14. LOCK IT UP
Miami @ Jacksonville - Line is Jags -2.5 - We're a bit of a sucker for the Dolphins, especially as the season progresses. The fingerprints of Parcells are all over this team, especially the defense. They hang in every game (good or bad) and often find a way to pull off the W. The Jags are a paper tiger this season, not nearly as good as their record. They will likely be without their only legitimate receiving threat this week (MSW). That puts way too much of the burden on little MJD and Miami will be amped to bottle up the smurf. Look to Chad Henne to establish himself as a hot up-and-coming QB this week in a W that strengthens the Fins' playoff hopes. Take Miami +2.5. LOCK IT UP
Carolina @ New England - Line is Pats -13 - Yikes. The Patriots are not very good. However, Matt Moore will be leading the Panthers into Foxboro this Sunday along with a dinged up DeAngelo WIlliams. We just don't see how this game stays close at all. The Panthers will be hard pressed to get into Patriot territory at all. The big question is whether Brady will play and we don't doubt he will. This is a blow out that will be over early. Look for something in the area of 31-10. Take NE -13. LOCK IT UP
Seattle @ Houston - Line is Houston -7 - No way. Not a chance that we like Houston to cover a TD spread. They just are not winners at this point and have a RB committee comprised of Chris "Running Real Upright" Brown and Ryan Moats. Uhn Ga. Seattle is playing reasonably well of late, at least well enough to hang with the Texans. This game is terribly unappealing from a fan perspective but we think it has potential for the gambler in you. Take the points as Matt Hasselback briefly returns to his 2006-form. Seahawks +7 - LOCK IT UP
St. Louis @ Tennessee - Line is Titans -13 - Oh the Rams. If I didn't have Steven Jackson on my fantasy team I'd likely see this team for what it really is. Which is, really bad. The Titans are focused on finishing this season strong, the Rams, not so much. There is not much more to say about this one. Actually, there is: Kyle Boller. Take the Titans -13. LOCK IT UP
Washington @ Oakland - Line is Skins -1 - Not gonna waste many keystrokes on this one. Raiders will not win again this week. Skins D is underrated. Take Washington -1. LOCK IT UP
San Diego @ Dallas - Line is Cowboys -3.5 - Until the Cowboys win a meaningful game at this point in the season, the Locks can't get behind them. Does Vegas realize that they are playing the red-hot Chargers this weekend? LDT will have a breakout game now that he is back in his old TCU stomping grounds. Rivers to Gates and VJax all game long. Not only do Chargers cover, they win outright. Take the Bolts +3.5. LOCK IT UP
Philadelphia @ NY Giants - Line is Eagles -1 - Unabashed tunnel vision for Giants. Gets me in trouble all the time. Especially holidays such as Thanksgiving. Got blown out by Eagles already once this year. Manning playing on bad feet. Secondary in shambles. Feels like a Big Win for Big Blue. Take the Giants +1 to dance at the Meadowlands on Sunday night. LOCK IT UP.
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