With only three afternoon contests scheduled today, we have several evening opportunities to make some coin. So kick back, drink some beers (Tyku if you are a trendy douche-bag with malfunctioning taste buds) and ring the register as the money rolls in. Let 'em pop, bro.
Boston @ Baltimore - For as good as Josh Beckett can be, there are a number of guys on the Orioles that hit him pretty good. Markakis, Roberts, Scott and Huff all have very solid career numbers vs. Beckett. The Orioles are rolling David Hernandez out to the mound, just six days after he held the BoSox to one run over seven innings. These Sox are trying hard to find themselves as their past several weeks have been wildly mediocre. Even so, Vegas has Boston installed as a -170 favorite. I'm going to take advantage of this line and take the Birds plus 1.5 runs (-110) to keep this contest very close. Red Sox prevail 4-3. LOCK IT UP
Detroit @ Cleveland - I'll tell you what, this Little Ricky Porcello has hit the rookie wall and hit it hard. He's pitching like the Ricky that chases the French exchange student in Better Off Dead (highly underrated movie). That said, these are the Cleveland Indians we are talking about. Detroit has already taken 7 out of 10 from this team this year. Jeremy Sowers has not found much success against Motown in his career (2-3, 6.66). We've got to think that the Tigers will rebound after last night's tough loss. We don't expect Porcello to be good, just good enough. Take Detroit (-125) to win here, 6-5. LOCK IT UP
Washington @ Pittsburgh - Boy did John Lannan and the Nats butt rape me last night. And I was so close to staying away from that game entirely. Live and learn. It is that much easier to pick against Washington (not that it was ever that hard) now that Nick Johnson plays for Florida. This Pirate team is turning some heads with their no-name offense and just good enough pitching. We've become fans and will proudly support the Bucs tonight. They can't be any worse than the Nationals. Look to Pitt (-105) to send the crowd home happy with a 5-3 win. LOCK IT UP
Arizona @ NYM - Sweet Jesus. We get Absolute Locks buttnut Hall of Famer Oliver Perez taking the mound today for the Pets. Bruce Chen and Ollie Perez on the same day. That's just nothing but clean living there. The eminently adequate Max Scherzer faces Perez and looks to keep a nice recent streak of starts alive. That shouldn't be too challenging against the likes of Angel Pagan, Alex Cora and Fernando Tatis. Look to the Pets to start looking like the Pets again. We'll take the DBacks (-150) to win 7-5. LOCK IT UP
Chicago @ Florida - Just seeing Big Z's name in the probable starters line for this game fills us with an array of mixed emotions. No pitcher in baseball elicits these type of feelings for the Locks more than Zambrano. We're going to ride the Z train in the belief that the Fish won't take a second straight game from the recently surging Cubbies. Not with Burke Badenhop throwing the ball. Aramis and the boys get their knocks in today and take this game easily. Take ChiTown minus 1.5 runs (+115) to win 7-3. LOCK IT UP
Colorado @ Cincinnati - The Rocks made us sweat one out last night but ultimately proved to be 1.5 runs better than the Reds. We think they'll win even more convincingly tonight. There is not a single batter on the Rockies that has faced Homer Bailey that isn't batting at least .333 against him; 5 of those guys are .500 or better against Homer. Colorado counters with Umbaldo Jiminez who can fire a shutout any time out. We look for a thoroughly dominating performance from Colorado all the way around. Take the Rocks minus 1.5 runs (+110) to win easily, 8-3. LOCK IT UP
LAA @ Minnesota - In a game that started out very promisingly for the Twinkies, the Halos proved once again why they are so goddamn annoying to play. We should have better known better. Yet, today, we find ourselves again leaning away from LAA. Simply put, we don't think Joe Saunders is very good. However, it is hard to imagine that the Angels would be a +134 dog in any situation these days. Combined that with the fact that Mauer and Morneau are a combined 1 for 14 against Saunders and I'm forced to go with the Halos. Take LAA (+134) to steal another game in Minnesota. Here's hoping Brian Fuentes does not have to throw any meaningful pitches in this one. Angels win 6-4. LOCK IT UP
Houston @ St. Louis - Put us in the group of people that just can't understand how the Astros play the Cardinals so tough. Didn't St. Louis dismiss the Dodgers with great disdain earlier this week. Now they are struggling to compete with the Stros? That just doesn't compute for us. And on top of everything else, now we have Absolute Locks nemesis, Magic Wandy Rodriguez taking the hill for Houston. Fortunately for St. Louie, they have Chris Carpenter throwing the ball for them. We absolutely love Carpenter. He'd be strongly considered as an option to start a World Series Game 7 if we could take anyone in baseball. That alone is enough to have us dismiss the spell that Houston has cast on us and select the Cards. Unfortunately, Vegas is thinking the same thing and has St. Louis as a -210 favorite. In order to make money here, we need to be willing to give the Stros a run and a half. That seems a bit of a stretch given Wandy's 10 wins and 2.65 ERA. We'll stretch it though. Go with the Red Birds minus 1.5 runs (+105) to prevail 5-2. LOCK IT UP
Seattle @ Texas - Oh Boy. This is like having to pick between your mother and your father. We love the Rangers. Absolutely love that team this year. However, we have a major crush on King Felix. In fact, we can't imagine under what circumstances we'd pick against him. This places us firmly on the proverbial horns of a dilemma. Vegas ain't helping us either as they have this game pretty darn close to a pick-em with the M's a slight favorite. We're simply going to have to trust King Felix and hope the M's offense can scrap together enough to get him a W. Take Seattle (-118) to W, 3-2. LOCK IT UP
Philadelphia @ San Francisco - Talk about a dilemma; this one has all of the same elements as the Seattle/Texas game. A stud pitcher we love (Lincecum) facing a juggernaut offense that we have a hard time ever picking against (Philly). This is enough to make us give up this whole handicapping racket. If we went with the stud pitcher in the last game, we should probably back the team we like in this one. It doesn't hurt that Joe Blanton has been very Lincecum-esque over the past two months. We think one or two bad pitches from Timmy-Boy make the difference in this one. We'll take the fightin' Phils (+127) to win in a great, great game. Final score is 4-2. LOCK IT UP
Toronto @ Oakland - The Jays may be the worst team in baseball right now. That is saying a whole lot with the Pirates, Nats, Pets and Indians still part of the big leagues. They'll be in the AL East cellar before too long and be absolutely kicking themselves for not dealing Halladay. I wrote all of that before even looking at the pitching matchup for today. You know what, I don't care what the pitching matchup is. Toronto stinks. Take the Athletic Supporters to claim their second straight win over the Canadians. A's (-110) win 4-2. LOCK IT UP
Milwaukee @ San Diego - Someone should really dump gasoline on my computer and light it on fire right before I try to pick a Milwaukee game. My relationship with the Brew Crew is like that of the guy who continues to date his girlfriend despite the fact that she has blown all of his friends. This is as unhealthy as it gets. But you know what? Just like the guy who watches his girl come home late again with jizz in her hair, I can't walk away. So I am sticking it out with these Brewers, even though they can't pitch or get a timely hit. All I see is how pretty they are when they decide to be nice to me every once in a while. Take Milwaukee (+105) to feign loyalty tonight with a 7-6 win. LOCK IT UP
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